|PhilAmina post benefit|
As a Homemaker/Housewife/ Stay-at-Home-Mom/ Ama de Casa, the responsibilities of caring for the family is a full-time job that tends to spill over into un-paid overtime and the occasional all- nighter. It’s totally all consuming! So when I’m presented with an opportunity to step out of this machine of orderly chaos (including but not limited to nursing duty, nose-picking etc. etc.), and into my ruby slippers, I’m sometimes faced with a bit of dis-ease.
This weekend we came face to face.
It’s been a while since I’ve done any major public speaking…well, that is if you don’t count the random stint I had on the Steve Harvey Show a few weeks ago. You see, prior to motherhood I spent my evenings singing Jazz at local Chicago Jazz spots and teaching yoga to enthused yogi’s seeking a metamorphosis (oh yeah… and don’t forget the many years of Event Planning too). I grew accustomed to navigating all types of social scenes both formal and informal. Now 2 years later, 2 babies later, exhausted and perhaps even malnourished, I’m a bit foggy brained and my candid humor and quick wit have taken a major hit. I know I’ve changed…motherhood has changed me.
So when the awesome organization that is credited with uniting yours truly with my soulmate, invited he and I to speak at their major benefit… in front of all of their major donors… I was a bit apprehensive (actually mortified is more like it).
It was totally unlike me to feel like this. I’ve always been one to rise to the occasion regardless of the challenge. Four years in boarding school…done. Four months in Ecuador…I’ll give it a go. Quit my day job and take my music on the road…count on it. I’m a “calculated” risk -taker, but the possibility of embarrassing myself after stepping out of “the game” for a while was a risk I wasn’t prepared to take. So I persuaded Phil to give the entire speech on his own. After all…he’s now the “pro” of the family.
But wait… it doesn’t end here.
When Phil contacted our beloved Alma Mater and expressed that due to the program time constraints he should give the speech alone (wink wink…nudge nudge), I was then asked to serve as emcee! Lawdy Lawd…you do have a sense of humor!!! Not only would I be charged with welcoming nearly 400 guests, but I would also be charged with engaging with them again…and again…and again.
Check and Mate! It was time to woman-up!
So on Saturday night I slipped on my white suit (which miraculously still fit after 2 pregnancies) and my sequence stilettos and faced the world! Maybe it was the power suit, or the “you’re so awesome”pep-talk that Phil whispered in my ear from time to time, but when I stepped onto the stage I wasn’t the frazzled ball-o-mess that I feared would unravel into a big heap on the floor. Instead I felt the culmination of all of my life experiences reflected back and me…and I was so proud of what I saw.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that Motherhood does change you. You’re not only physically different, but you’re emotionally and spiritually different and sometimes just the “thought” of knowing you’re different makes you feel unsure of your “new” self. But the truth of the matter is that Motherhood requires a very new set of skills, and whether you’ve re-entered the working world shortly after delivering new life or if you’ve chosen to pseudo-hibernate and raise your kiddies like me…you’re still all that you have been…and more.
I found the cure to my dis-ease and the self-conscious symptoms that it exhibited.
It’s called facing it…
…and I’m so glad I did.
|With the Lovely Marcy Rodriquez|
|With Heidi and Andreas|
|With my Best Friend!|
Can you re-call a situation in which you rose to the challenge and surprised even yourself?